The Simply Breathtaking Series

”God, you piss me off Melissa.” “Love you too.”

I arrived at work to find the shop window fit-out was halfway down. I looked at the two staff on and I pointed to it without a word.

“We’ve tried to fix it Melissa, but it doesn’t seem to go up or back down.”

I stared at the frames, lost in thought. Overwhelmed by a 6’10” man that came up next to me.

“Need a hand?”

“Yeah that would be great,” I said. I looked up at the older man before me and I wouldn’t say he was attractive, but I couldn’t stop looking him over. He didn’t need to get a ladder, he was that bloody tall he could stretch his arm out and almost touch the ceiling.  The author in me kicked into overdrive and I was busy observing everything about the distance between him and the ceiling, the proportion of his leg to torso ratio. I can see why some people think I’m a space head as I look back at the situation. I didn’t say a word as he tried to pull it down for me.  Busy looking at his hands, arms and features. I wondered how much he had to duck under a door frame. Was his kitchen bench higher than a normal one? You know normal author overdrive stuff. However, I noticed the shutter didn’t budge for him.

“Sorry, I wasn’t much help.”

“That’s okay. Thanks for trying.” I smiled.

He left and somehow I think I knew how to fix the shutter. I didn’t look at anyone. Focused on the ground as I walked out the back, grabbed the ladder without a word to anyone. I was in a zone. I needed to figure out what was wrong. Observation was the key. I kicked off the heels, got up the ladder and worked it out. The door was up within five minutes.

The girls glared at me shaking their heads. “I don’t understand how you know things sometimes.” I shrugged my shoulders, cleaned up the area and went out the back to grab a coffee before I started. “Melissa, you have someone here to see you?” I walked out and the same gentleman was back, with a drill in hand.

“You fixed it?” he said.

“Yeah, the arms of the shutter lock had released into the frame. The shutter springs still seem in working order at the moment.” I could see it was his turn to look me over with that same blank look on his face as I spoke. His silence was deafening, so I stopped talking about the lock mechanism and gear drive. “Aww, you brought a drill to help me fix it. Aren’t you sweet? I hope you didn’t go far to go get it.”

“No. I had one in the truck. Thought I would come back and help. But I’m not needed.” I looked over to a staff member  behind him and noticed her swallow hard.

“Believe me, it was appreciated. You want a coffee? I boiled the jug.”

“No, I better get to my next job. I’m already late.”

“Okay, thanks again.” He left with a what the expression. “Did you girls ring up a maintenance man?” I asked.

“No,” One girl answered.

The other had to have her two cents worth. “He was one of the random guys that stop to help you. As they always do.”

“What?” I noticed the bitchy comment.

“We were there for hours trying to work it. No one bothered to stop and help us. You stand there all tall blonde, in your skirt and heels looking doughy for a minute and men come to your aid.”

“I wasn’t doughy, I was thinking how to fix it. It was just chance that someone was walking pass when I got here.”

“Melissa, it always happens to you. You don’t even realize you touch your hair, smile at your own thoughts while you think. Then somehow men approach you.”

“I didn’t ask for his help. I was just observing the situation and what caused the door to stop half way up.I don’t realize I do those things when I think. it’s not like I can see myself when I do it. Gee.”

“You end up spinning them out as you say something intelligent looking like the girl out of legally blonde and they end up leaving…” She paused and looked to the other staff member. “What’s another word for loss of words?”

“Incoherent,” I said.

“Yeah, that word. God, you piss me off Melissa.”

“Love you too grumpy arse.”

“Here I am looking for a man and they fall at your feet. You don’t even notice how men find you irresistible. You are oblivious to it. I thought he was quiet yummy.”

“Do you want me to go after him and get his number for you?” I said.

“No, because he didn’t even know I existed.”

This whole heated conversation started me thinking about how body language may have something to do with my so called “men find you irresistible comment” as it wasn’t the first time someone has said something like that. It’s true I did not understand why, but it does happens. I even had a woman put her breasts in my face on Melbourne Cup day as she wanted to sleep with me. Had no idea who she was. I hadn’t even spoken to her or even seen her on the table next to me. Until she came up and said “I want you to suck on these.”  Erm was all I could say.  All my friends gasped at this openness of this chick and after they got rid of her for me they said Melissa is she your lover or something? After I laughed my arse off and said I’ve never seen her before in my life. At least we had a good laugh. People have said before that they’re sure I have an invisible ink that people see with I write about sex on my forehead.

Being the curious person I am, I needed  to look into this further as I don’t like people being pissed at me. I needed to find a way for my colleague to be noticed by men.

I found out through research of attraction I do, do things I don’t even realize. It’s the body language I express that make men or women comfortable enough to make a move. Fact from a University out of Missouri. The women that are approached often make over 35 body language gestures which means their body said something irresistible to them. In an hour an average looking women out could be approached by up to four men.

What are these gestures?  Simple things like smiling, raising eyebrows (hard for girls having botox) short darting glances, arm flexes, hair flicks, touching hair, neck caresses, laughing and other displays. Monica Moore study found the beauty that sat doing nothing while out is unlikely to be approached at all no matter how beautiful she is. Only when a woman’s body language expresses these irresistible traits that men feel comfortable making a move.

I need to work on my colleague’s body language to get her noticed. I love a challenge. I can’t wait to see her in action. By the way if you want to be noticed, a woman in red increases her chances of being asked out. As ladies in red are perceived as more sexually receptive. I wonder if that’s why so many people hook up at Christmas parties… most women wear red.  Interesting…Time to ponder.

Enjoy it any way you can! Mwah.

Melissa Craig



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